Chiangmai Zoo

After a super-relaxing Saturday (played Pirates vs Ninjas and got a massage, that's it!) I pulled my socks up (well, put my jandals on) on Sunday and headed out for a beautiful stroll around the Chiangmai Zoo. Set in the super lush foothills surrounding the city, it was a very peaceful experience and I took in jaguars, crocodiles, hornbills, a tiger and some Asiatic brown bears that looked very fighty.

Headed to the airport in the late afternoon and bumped into none other than Sam the Pilot! He managed to get me on a business class seat and leaving this beautiful city with the setting the sun over my shoulder, I knew that I would be back here again to spend some serious rancho relaxo time.

This shot's for Jamie

Friday 16 November

A 6am wake-up call and a three hour flight got me to Chiangmai in order to check out the scene in northern Thailand. Very chill with the right idea was my first impression - slightly ghetto in a good way.

Got a bit of work done in the hotel then hit up some tom yam soup on Nimmanhaemin Road and bumped into Pat and Wan from the Tiger team in true village fashion. Kard Chung Doi was the location of this particular night's trouble and it started with some good local death metal mixed with live manga art - you gotta love the way the Thais mix it up.

Got some food in the belly then hit up the party proper where lots of college kids seemed very picky but got into a couple of the bands - apparently there are free live concerts every night here so it explains their lack of enthusiasm.

After enjoying a few rounds of Tiger, the cops enforced the liquor license around midnight and we left to fight another day - though not without a couple of warm-down Heinekens in the crowded club at the hotel basement.

FTA 2007: Girls, Guns & Beer

14-16 September

Bintan was the earmarked location for the 31st FTA, with this year's all-star line-up featuring the unique twist of a girlfriend for each participant. We left Tanah Merah on the Friday evening and took the easy ferry across to Mana Mana (now with the moniker Nirwana Beach Club). Friday night was a low-key evening of beers, pasta and a bottle of Macallan before retiring respectfully. Kevin arrived on Saturday morning and the respect stopped there. Shot some air rifles and loosed a few arrows, hit the banana boat for a bit of head-slamming jocularity, played some beach volleyball and frisbee, and capped off the day with some sunset ski-doo. Awesome. The night experienced a trough around dinner time but we soon put things straight by returning to our balcony and setting to our drinks in workmanlike fashion. The couple format meant that many fell earlier than would otherwise be expected, but Luke and I stayed up with Dawn pondering cause and effect. Sunday was mainly a write-off of lazing around, having beers and watching the rugby. Took the 5.30 ferry home and made it back safely in a state of non-toxic bliss.

Tiger Translate Bangkok

Friday 7 September

In truly OTT style, I got a few hours sleep and went straight back to Changi to hop on a flight to Bangkok. Cruised through the new airport there (great only one-way) and hit downtown, lunched and met up with the team just after their media session. The hot and heavy Bangkok air was in stark contrast to the cooler Bali breeze, but as night fell I made my way to RCA and attended the launch event for Tiger Translate in Thailand. The totally up-for-it crowd of young Bangkok hipsters flowed in steadily until the ex-club Astra was heaving to locally brewed punk rock chicks and a Japanese Ikebana lighting guru. Chilled on the street before hooking up with Barnaby for a couple of beers, then made it home for a few hours sleep before the flight home. 24 Jam.

Seminyak

4-6 September

After all that activity we made a concious effort to do nothing for the remaining three days - and nothing we certainly did! Had some coffee, bought some DVDs, flollopped in the pool, ate wonderfully and checked out some stunning sunsets. Something about staying in such a gorgeous villa makes you want to milk every moment of it by not leaving, which in turn induces a vaguely uncomfortable feeling of sloth. Swimming in the sea is always the best antidote.

Ubud

Monday 3 September

Hit the road soon after 10am and headed north to Ubud - checked out the Monkey Forest and had a good lunch at a roadside warung run by a silver fox from New Jersey and his wife - Naughty Nuri's - good combination of authentic nasi goreng and spare ribs!

Wandered briefly through the town but nothing made us want to stay so we drove back to Seminyak. Chilled out for a while then wandered up the road for a great Greek dinner accompanied by our NZ Sauvignon Blanc.

Kuta

Sunday 2 September

Had a chill morning and got dropped off in Kuta at the site of the October 2002 blasts - paid respects at the memorial there and saw the site of the Sari Club which is empty and overgrown now - everything around it seems business as usual.

Walked through the streets and did some low level shopping and eating before hitting the beach - all of which was a lot more manageable and less crowded than I had expected. The beach was an endless stretch of surfers and hawkers, all very relaxed and spread out, enabling us to walk slowly northwards in the afternoon sun.

Stopped for a drink at Zanzibar in Legian, then proceeded to the Sofitel where I had a great swim and we met up with Jamie's friend Laurence and her boyfriend Philippe. Cruised back to Ku De Ta for a sundowner or two, then to Queen's Tandoor for some of the best Indian food I've ever had. Delicious! Walked home after dinner, though not before dropping some coin at a fantastic shop selling Brazilian beach wear. Choice.

Pass the Jandals, I Think We're in Bali

Saturday 1 September

Having worked like madmen all week, Jamie and I battled sleep deprivation and escaped work just in time to catch a Friday evening flight to Bali, where Mum & Ken were waiting, rancho relaxo style, in a gorgeous two bedroom villa just back from the beach in Seminyak.

We both crashed and emerged ten hours later into some beautiful sunshine and poolside action. Chilled for a few hours then walked over to Ku De Ta to chill some more. Got pounded by the waves, had a cleansing ale, and walked up Jalan Oberoi for some delicious and authentic Italian food at La Trattoria. Yum! Passed out around midnight.

Three Worlds in a Day

Wednesday 18 July

From the rocking club we said our goodbyes, went to the hotel, packed and showered then took off for the airport at the break of dawn. Wow. The 6.30am flight was smooth and we passed out before the plane even took off, stealing a couple of hours sleep on the way to Beijing. Thinking what would be the best way to spend our few hours in the motherland, we decided to head straight for our courtyard house and chilled there in the lounge - cosy, welcoming and relaxed. Xiao Ling met us and the three of us had one final meal of dumplings and green tea, in between snoozing. Leaving the place for good this time, we said our farewells to the lovely staff and I realised how warm-hearted Beijingers can be. Lin Yi Lian's song on the car stereo couldn't have been timed better and we headed off across the afternoon heat and traffic singing along with the cheesy Mandarin ballad :) The flight home was delayed, as the Beijing airport is packed to the gunnels, so again we passed out before taking off, slept most of the way home and returned safely into my baby's arms. Mission accomplished.

Teretj to UB

Tuesday 17 July

Took it easy in the morning, headed to the brewery, then joined Lester for lunch at the Oasis - a backpacker type place run by an Austrian couple. Headed downtown and did some work with Mogan at the pub, which was now able to sell Tiger after a directive came late the previous night. Sat outside and observed the well-heeled population of UB walk past in the sun. Mogan noted that the Mongolians were the Aryans of Asia (tall, strong, smart and good-looking) and he wasn't wrong.

Headed back east and in the late afternoon drove about 40 minutes out of town to a preserved area called Teretj - miles and miles of beautful nothingness in all directions. Had a beer and took a walk up the hill in the twilight, the immensity and peacefulness of the place kind of went right through your bones, like the cold in the winter must do as well. Feasted on Mongolian dumplings for dinner before heading back tot he brewery, playing a little horse-head violin, then into town to meet Odgerel for a market visit. Though initially reluctant, Mogan and I knew that with a 4.30am pickup scheduled from the hotel to the airport, there was really only ever going to be one way to approach this evening.

Headed first to the New World, the top Tiger outlet by volume and the draft beer tasted delicious! Walked through a couple of neighbouring outlets and was delighted to see Tiger doing really well. Wanted to check out some low-end local places but they had shut (official closing time of midnight) so we proceeded to Metropolis, one of the hottest places at the moment. With an interior modelled a bit on Bed Supperclub, the place was a high-end nightclub drawing the premium local crowd (and us). Odgerel and Odno were apalled that we hadn't tried Mongolian vodka yet, so we proceeded to drink it the way they do, over ice and down the hatch! Though the DJ wasn't mixing to speak of, the crowd were into it, absolutely beautiful, and Mogan and I lit the place up with our Tiger shirts and dancing shoes!

Ulaanbaatar

Monday 16 July

Our wake-up call never happened so we got ready in a rush and drove out to the brand new MCS Tiger Brewery on the eastern outskirts of town. Mongolia has only 2 million people and half of them live in UB - it seems a good proportion of these were scattered in 'gers' (the movable circular tents) in the city and the nothern hills. Lester welcomed us and took the time to show us around even though he was in the middle of a crisis - having launched the brewery with great success less than a month ago, a few officials decided they wanted a piece of the action and revoked our brewing license until the right palms were greased.

Drove downtown and walked around the heart of the city - big, bright, busy, the citizens were modern and liberal, though the traffic was very wild west. Had lunch with Mogan, Lester and Bat (the world-class chemist turned commercial director) and hung out while they met the MCS chairman to try and pull some strings. Back to the brewery we met the marketing team, found out more about their activities and presented Tiger Translate. At the end of the working day we made our way to the Tiger tavern and imbibed some of the tastiest Tiger beer I've ever had (sugar, no maize) with Bat, the technical director and Gus from PNG. One pint turned into 6 and we got into detailed conversation about the stabilising of beer to withstand the extreme temperatures in Mongolia, distribution over winter, the current licensing issues, and eventually the ancient history of Mongolia! Bat was a fountain of knowledge and proved to be one of the smartest guys I've met in a long time.

With a late sunset around 9-10pm, the night was already on when we rolled into town and headed first to Marco Polo. There we were entertained by various dancing troupes, the highlight of which was about 8 girls, each 6 feet tall, dressed in eastern bloc military uniforms (though I'm not sure the skirts were quite that short during the Cold War) and doing a routine while a crackly record played Soviet marching tunes. Awesome.

Made a quick stop at Crazy Banana and had a Heineken, but not much was happening so Bat took us to Face - a great club where we drank more beer (surprise!) and shook it on the dance floor - the entire place was heaving on a Monday night! Enjoyed a feast of Korean food for supper and made it back to bed safely, secure in the knowledge that if anyone was to show you a good time in UB, Bat was the man.

Wo Ai Beijing

Sunday 15 July

Getting another decent few hours of sleep I woke up and slowly packed my gear - getting ready to leave the gorgeous courtyard house was not easy. Jumped in a cab with Mogan and made our way south, past Qianmen, to an old beat hutong area housing a 100% bona fide Beijing duck place called Li Qun. Dashing through the warm rain as our cab dropped us off and meeting up with Xiao Ling, we ran into the welcoming, cosy place with a log fire roaring.

Perused the menu, thought carefully, then proceeded to order 2 ducks and 2 plates of veges. This was accompanied by a few quarts of Tsingtao, and finally Mogan and I felt fully relaxed, with nowhere to go other than right here, in the duck heaven of Beijing. Orgasmic duck, we ate and ate until we could eat no more, then kept going. After lunch the sun came out and we wandered around the area - these hutongs won't be here much longer and given their run-down conditions (compared to the ones north of Chang An Jie) you could almost see why. Saw some killer veges for sale on the street then jumped in a cab and took the ring road up to Dali Restuarant in Gulou. A nice area with a good summer vibe, the restaurant was showcasing our artwork and beer, and felt almost like a country cafe in the far north of NZ. Headed back to the hotel to put some finishing touches to the PR and packing, said goodbye to Tanya, and made our way out to the airport.

If coming into Beijing airport is a breeze, getting out is a drama and a half. Luckily we were very relaxed and psyched for our upcoming mission - Mogan going through security and having to make his tellytubby and donkey dance on the X-ray machine was the most fun I've ever had clearing customs! Had a light dinner and a beer in the airport while waiting for our flight, then boarded a Mongolian Airlines flight to Ulaanbaatar! A smooth two hour flight got us there and by 11pm we were landing in this dark, low-rise city nestled in a river valley, further north than I've ever been.

Initial impressions were of a rough and ready country where the people on the plane looked rugged and leathery, the baggage carousel was chaotic and violent, and the road into town was cracked and bumpy. Driving to our hotel I looked out the window to get an idea of the place and it didn't look like stepping outside at 1am on Sunday night would be the best idea, so we didn't. Checked into our brand spanking new rooms (mine smelt of noxious paint), left the windows open to get a cool breeze and heard the dogs barking, then headed to the hotel bar for a nightcap of a Golden Gobi lager - yum! Going to bed I heard yelling in the streets and succumbed to a decent sleep gratefully.

Tiger Translate Beijing

Saturday 14 July

God punished me for going to bed early - I woke up feeling utterly exhausted and couldn't shake the feeling all day. Checked out the venue before meeting Moira for a long lunch in the arts district - fuelled on salad, Chilean sauvignon blanc and fusion dumplings (??) I psyched myself into action. Got into press conference mode and worked with the GM of China to pull off some pretty solid interviews with the Chinese media.

One thing led to the other and before you knew it the event was in full swing - art, music, betties, all on. Xiao Ling and Moira came and I showed them around, crazily enough I bumped into Sherry (Thorston's friend) and Warren (Hua Xin) who were in attendance and loving it! Though the man tried to bring me down I took charge of my mind and got into the music, the cool folks and the primo Beijing vibe - 'Groove is in the Heart' was the last track of the night and we milked it :)

After the show we took a minibus back to the hutong and chilled in the courtyard with Tiger, tea and whiskey. Listened to Ben Frost's band, Danger of Death, on myspace and got entranced by the internet with its tales of Moby Dick, Captain Ahab and more! Realising that I had grown a tolerance to all external substances I relaxed in my stubbies and wife beater as the crowd around us thinned out.

As dawn broke and only a few men were left standing, we headed up to the roof and Bennett did a fantastic shaolin lip sync move, though claiming to be a lover not a fighter. Put on some slippers and shuffled down the street to a morning dumpling feast with Mogan, Burgerman and Bennett. Our two guests could only handle so much and left, so Mogan and I continued on our merry little path of self-destruction by dumpling. At 7am we slept, replete once again.

Of course they're real!

Friday 13 July

Woke up fully clothed and headed to Lido Hotel for a simple lunch with Xiao Ling. Got some info on the 2008 Olympics tickets and hapened upon some great blue and yellow faux-snakeskin sneakers! Bought them for RMB150 to find out they are also limited edition UNKLE kicks - nice :)

Met Mogan and Benedictus at a cafe in the arts district for a Qingdao then headed over to Song Yang's studio where all the artists were hard at work creating some fantastic pieces. Helped interview a 60 year-old cougar in Mandarin, found out he worked for the Chengde Railroad Company issuing tools, and was enjoying watch Li Qiu Qiu bomb "bie fei hua"! Had a warm beer in the afternoon sun then headed back to change up for dinner.

Met the China team at Lapopo for dinner, sat next to Edmond and enjoyed some fantastic Sichuan food over the big round table mafioso vibe. After dinner they exploded into the market visit (leaving me behind!) and I caught up with them at Eudora Station, then walked the entire stretch up, across and down Sanlitun, in and out of Vic's and Mix without stop! At Houhai we sat down beside the lotus flowers and stopped to actually enjoy a few Tiger Crystals and get some insights into the market.

Proceeded on past Houhai Tian Tang and the chunky electro beats had real Beijingers dancing- I wanted to stay! As we said goodbye to the bosses, Vincent appeared out of nowhere like Batman all geared up to party - I reluctantly stuck with plan A, returned back to the hutong around midnight, had a few quiets in the courtyard and got to sleep around 3am.

I'm Sorry did you say 24 Jam?

Thursday 12 July

Slept from 7 till 11, got up and worked in the lounge area for several hours with Tanya and Mogan. Got the stuff that needed to be done, done. Took off to Jingshan Gongyuan and it was as primo, transcendent and quiet as ever. Boom. Gathered the crew in the courtyard and proceeded to dinner, a chaotic Beijing duck affair where the only duck I ate was the skin entree - helping the chinese and laowai artists communicate was my priority. The beer was cloudy but no-one was paying too much attention. "China thrives on chaos" as Sayson said, and with so many hangers-on, interference and craziness, one could only hope for the best. Dinner went as well as it possibly could and we rolled on to a nice bar at Qianhai, ordered cases of Tiger Crystal and got into the brains of Ben Frost, Li Qiu Qiu and the Berlin editor. Fantastic.

Luke Bennett made the call and we emptied a bottle of vodka for, well, goodness, before making it home safely (not without Mogan purchaing a tellytubby and a donkey, go figure). Back in the courtyard we jammed a while with the Germans and then got down to the rind with Mogan and Benedictus. Wow. Had an early morning gongfu session on the roof (Mogan - please insert video here) then proceeded to a full-on dumpling and beer mission for breakfast. Went to/on bed fully clothed and with shoes on. Yay for Beijing!

Beijing Bicycle

Wednesday 11 July

Woke to a healthy breakfast, took a short walk in the neighbourhood to get my bearings, then proceeded to 798 Space to run through the event details and venue. Nice area! Dealing with the local agency was very hard work, but Mogan kept it together really well and by the end of the day we were confident it's going to rock. Grabbed a quick Heineken as a reward then met up with Xiao Ling for a quality vegetarian dinner - Buddhist vibe throughout and classic dish names like "Ai ni mei shangliang". Walked down the street to Sanlitun and had a Tiger on the main strip, later joined by Sayson, returned to the hotel for a shower and a scotch, then connected with Mogan for jam time.

Made it back to Gongti Beilu and met up with the artists at a Filipino rock bar for more Tiger crystal, then rolled down the street to Mix - a big club opposite Vics at the Workers' Stadium - ate the 30 yuan cover charge for seven people and proceeded into an electric atmosphere with none other than Slim Shady. A great vibe with lots of jostling and dancing, a local guy tried to rark me up by blocking my way twice and asking if I had a problem! I smiled and said no, and he melted away allowing me to proceed to the dance floor. Some gregarious Americans had an oversize bottle of Chivas and a case of coke, a Russian working girl shook her bon bon, Luke Bennett from Berlin let go on the dance floor, and I just observed quietly, drinking it all in.

Ben Frost wanted to hit the hay so we took the cue and made it back to the hotel in one piece, but I was far from over. Luke Benedictus (an editor from Oz) and I hopped on some classic Beijing bicycles, with Mogan riding pillion behind me and Sayson behind Luke. Whiskey and water in the backpack and we were off (after a couple of false starts by Luke, "It's just like riding a bike...", crash!) Tiananmen square was our destination, and by hook or by crook we made it, though not without me noting that Beijing is a lot bigger in reality than it is on the maps. With a deep thigh burn we pushed on south, onto Chang An Jie, and eventually to the Gate of Heavenly Peace. Unfortunately the quiet whisky session we had hoped for was foiled by garrisons of guards and policemen, and droves of Chinese lining up to watch the dawn flag-raising ceremony! Not about to let the PLA spoil our fun, we mixed some whiskey and water and stood about in a haphazard manner right in front of Chairman Mao before we were asked to move along. With the sky threatening to lighten and the crowds building, we escaped the underwhelming prospect of the flag-raising, dropped off our passengers, and returned home as dawn broke.

Mogan, the committed jammer, waited for me in the courtyard and we had a quiet Tsingtao as we waited for the xiaochi places to open. At 5am we set off and wandered through the ancient alleyways as they came to life; an older guy exercising in stretch pants, aunty in her pyjamas, uncle puffing his first cigarette of the day. Mogan busted out his brand new SLR and the inhabitants shook their heads as we photographed their rubbish :) At the intersection with Chao Nei Nan Xiao Jie we executed xiao long bao (with a thicker, northern type of skin), a form of you tiao and eggs. Paid (9 yuan!) and proceeded straight to another xiao chi dian where super-friendly aunty fed us another two plates of dumplings. Replete, spent, bulbous, we slept at 7am in peace. Thank you Beijing.

A Sort of Homecoming

Tuesday 10 July

Beijing here we come! Took a 5pm flight north with Mogan and laughed up a storm with a back-to-back Will Ferrell session over beers. Arrived in Beijing and flew through the airport, into town on the smooth and clear roads, into Yan Yue Hutong just north of Chang An Jie. Checked into a gorgeous siheyuan called Hotel Cote Cour SL - a luxurious boutique hotel right in the heart of old Beijng.

Took a moment to catch our breath in the cool evening air of the courtyard, then jumped in a cab and made our way to Qianhai. My Chinese still works, yay! There we met up with Sayson and walked along the strip on the lake's edge, found ourselves a Tiger outlet and enjoyed my first Tiger Crystal - smooth and tasty, yum. Kept it low-key and made it to bed around 3.30.

Return to civilization

After a day of doing absolutely nothing, we took a choppy ride on a small fishing boat back to Senggigi and finished up where we started, with bruschetta and pasta at Cafe Alberto. A civilised flight took us home on Saturday and we live to tell another tale.

Tropical Islanding

Struggling to get up after only 12 hours sleep, we had a late breakfast and some snorkelling action in the gorgeous sun. After kicking back in the midday heat, we took a walk down the shady path to Bob the Frenchman's jungle place for a 7-up and had lunch at a Sasak place by the beach - nice buzz. Continued walking north as the sun continued its path across the clear blue sky, snorkel action not happening but good swims nonetheless. Made it to Good Heart Cafe for a magenta and lilac sunset, red snapper and beers, a cedomo ride home and (surprise!) another early night.

E-Z Ryder

Tuesday 5 June

Hit the road at 10am and cruised down the cool north side of the mountain on a motor scooter with Jamie riding pillion and a couple of guys leading the way. Took an hour to reach the sea after lots of braking and down-shifting, then flat all the way to Bangsal. Some low-level dodgy guys bothered us while we ate lunch, waiting for the 2pm ferry to Gili Meno, which we shared with some lumber, instant noodles and fresh veges, yum! The so-called honeymoon island didn't disappoint and we had our pick of places once again, ending up with a comfy air-con bungalow called Kontiki, on the south-east of the island with a great beach and nice vibe. Snapper and curry filled us up while the local brother sorted us out.

Like Heaven for the first week...

Took it easy, as if there was any other choice, reading and taking in the view of the volcanic cone outside our door. Walked through the village to an array of kids, empty buidlings, wildflowers, kites, bamboo and dirt roads. In the shadow of the mountain we felt the traditional way of life there - friendly and unspoilt still. In the evening we walked back across the peaceful foothills and along the parched riverbed, through a secret garden and watched as the sun set in the near distance...

That road is gonna be a problem

Healthy start to the day before riding a motorbike up the road to a national park with a nice walk to a hair-growth enhancing waterfall. Still can't grow a full beard. Rode back for lunch then took a van ride through a bumpy, steep and apparently impossible road right through the centre of the island, lush and green. Made it to Sembalun Lawang where we checked into a cosy guest house and breathed in the peace. Pottered up the road before sunset and found the landscape transforming from sweaty south east asian jungle into rugged, volcanic, NZ vegetation. Found a gorgeous dry riverbed and sat in silence, feeling the low places like the Tao. Back after sunset for some tea, dinner and bed.

Tetebatu

2 June 2007

Took a drive to the village of Tetebatu and checked into the Green Orry, which somehow reminded me of a resort for North Korean officials. After a cleansing ale and some gado gado for lunch, we took a guided walk through beautiful rice padi fields on the southern slopes of Gunung Rinjani. Never walked on this type of terrain before, extra beautiful and required extra care.

Seng-giggidy-giggidy-gyeah!

Lombok, 31 May 2007

Celebrating Vesak Day with a delayed afternoon flight out of Singapore, Jamie and I kicked off honeymoon #4 by going back to where it all began (sort of); Hotel Dharmarie on Senggigi, this time upping the ante with a beautiful candlelit dinner at Cafe Alberto. Spent the next day chilling in the garden, spot of yoga, fish and beer for lunch by the beach, then a quality swim. Got into some Absolut Pears at sunset and had Thai dinner before bumping into Nandi, the botak dude from two years ago! His invitation to hang out on the beach with a fire, beers, guitar and tea was too good to resist, so we didn't.

Saturday it's a Saturday

Using the eye mask and unplugging all phones, I got a decent sleep and proceeded to breakfast with Mogan and Raj. Took things fairly slow and bought a present for Jamie downtown, before getting to the event around 5pm. Had a TV interview for Thailand then checked out SweetTalk, a bunch of artist presentations including EbOY and Steve Lawler - hot stuff!

Abi showed up again and later Pascal, so I fed the boys Tigers and we hung out and shot the breeze - awesome to see these guys after 10 years worth of life experiences! After the event wound down at 10pm and I said my thank yous and goodbyes, we walked down the street to get some great pizza (so cheap!) and then to a great East Berlin bar, one of the originals after the wall came down. Real nice beer and whiskey while we caught up and reminisced about the crazy stuff we had got up to in Dunedin a decade earlier.

Aiming for and executing a relatively early night, we proceeded to the final location, an extremely underground club called Hangar where I danced, spent, to some more techno beats. Left around 3 and had a wind down glass of juice and samosas back at the hotel with Mogan, Anni, Steve, Ann and Yin. Primo people and great times all round. Berlin, we salute you.

Achtung Baby!

Operating on a few hours sleep, I had breakfast at the hotel and made it to the press conference where my piece went well. The Danish crew had been partying just as hard and turned up as well. Bought myself some great new jeans in the most strategic jeans purchase of my life, before heading back to steal an hour's nap.

Friday night and the event was on! Had a great durum (kebab) and a coke, injected myself with a cocktail of chicken essence and Undaberg to try and bring my energy on, but mainly got by on reserves. Great DJs and a real party atmosphere between 11 and 1, the place was jumping with people creating their own shirts, artist collaborations, a great mix of people from art, music, media and clubbinmg scenes.

Abi turned up around 1am and I gave him a massive bear hug! Joshua from our hotel also turned up and we took the party to the next level with Mogan as everyone got ready to move on. Staying till the end at 3am, we proceeded to Panorama, a pumping club in an old power station. This place has dark rooms on some nights but the vibe tonight was just a really party dance vibe, people throwing looks around left and right, the DJ getting up on guitar and vocals at some points to banging techno beats. Had one beer and then a bottle of water as drinking seemed to have lost its appeal. Could see the sun creep through the blinds but kept on rocking with Abi and his sister's boyfriend Kim till the wee hours.

Strategic exit around 5.30, tired but happy, the crisp morning air outside woke me up instantly. Got home for a decent sleep to jam another day.

On Time

Getting to the money end of the week, we started with a great breakfast of customised tosai from the Sri Lankan chef. Got some work done then headed to the venue for the final walk-through and tweaking - looking great! Took part in the press conference briefing at 3pm - all the artists (Rikus, Nomad, Stefan Marx and Luke Bennett) seemed really cool.

Took the train to Samariter Strasse and met up with Pascal Engel after 10 years! Had a coffee in his neighbouthood, the last district to be renovated after the GDR days, and checked out his pad, a great one-bedroom walk-up on the fifth storey with a coal stove and only EUR240 per month! His girlfriend's squirrel had died the day before but he seemed ok. We had a beer down the road and he filled me in on the last 8 years of his life studying to be a psychologist, and how he was finding a job and looking at becoming a coach.

Zoomed across town back to Q Hotel and proceeded to dinner with the Asian media and artists, Christian, Chong Lee and our Danish distributors. Had a very slow dinner at a trendy but tasty place called Bangaluu, then to Sage Club where we had a private lounge overlooking the dance floor, rock night, and our own fridge full of Tiger. Worked our way through it with determination as everyone other than the beer boys faded. One yum seng and many hours later, we traversed town again (Mogan and I re-interpreting U2 to the car radio) to a house-like bar and met a cat from the Dominican Republic. Made it home as the sun rose.

Non-Wednesday

Worked pretty much all day in the hotel, save a late lunch with Mogan and Raj in the neighbourhood, yummy pesto gnocchi. Met Christian for dinner at 7.30pm in Mitte - sashimi, red duck curry and Tiger. Proceeded to a bar named White Trash for a beer after dinner, needless to say I felt very at home there - the rock played over the crackly mono speakers really worked. Tested one more bar and was introduced to the cult beer from the South that is enjoying real popularity now with zero marketing. Slept well.

Prenzlauerberg

Worked in the hotel while the rain started and stopped, got out around 4pm and went over to Prenzlauerberg to meet the Flora & Fauna folks. Found a bruin cafe down the road and sampled a Kraft Malz (non-alocoholic and sweet, d'oh!) together with Steve, Tanya, Mogan and the artists from Bangkok and Beijing.

Mogan found us some felafel and kebabs for dinner, before we dropped off the jet-lagged crew. Mogan and I headed out to Cookies around midnight, apparently the best club in Berlin. Perched at the bar we got into some Pilsener Urquell while the crowd filled up, then hit the floor for a serious dance. Fun, good-looking crowd with a pretty good attitude. Got out after 4am and slept till 10.30.

Oranienburger Strasse

Worked for half a day in the Q Hotel, headed east to check out the venue (grungy!) and then avoided the rain in a cozy place with a hundred German beers. Got through a handful of them including some Bratwurst on sauerkraut and the rain kept coming. Headed to a stylo little bar across the street for some great whiskey and a madly friendly bartender. Aiming for an early night we couldn't face turning in, so had a "wind-down" half litre of beer back on the west side and a Shadow session back in the hotel room - primo.

A Sunday Afternoon in Mitte

After working hard to get a decent sleep, I rewarded myself with a good breakfast in the hotel, which to my delight was accompanied by a killer DJ playing beats over Sunday brunch - how can you argue with a little jazz over your smoked salmon and eggs!

Jumped on the train and switched lines at Zoo Station in order to get to East Berlin to meet Mogan and Anni - spent the afternoon wandering, having beers, tea, checking out the beautful old town, churches, Humboldt University and Berlin Dome. Gorgeous.

Chilled out on the grass in more than one park, then found a great spot for dinner (the first place to open in East Berlin after the wall came down in 1989) - indulged in a plate of antipasto and a couple of Bavarian beers.

Die Tiger Kommen!

Barely scraping it together through the week, I made it onto a midnight plane from Changi to Frankfurt. My first experience in Germany, at 7am on Saturday morning (doing my best human imitation of working at a table waiting for my connecting flight) was an elderly woman photographing me. I must have looked (or smelt) exotic.

Berlin struck me first as a beautiful, sprawling green city, low rise but developed. Made it to my home base, Q Hotel, then met up with Mogan and Annika for a slow wander along a river on the city's east side. After my first beer and weiner schnitzel we joined a roaming band of 24 jammers, dancing to quality beats while they directed traffic around them in the 6 o'clock sun.

Adjacent to the Kaiser's army bakery, we had dinner at a massive warehouse space on a river in industrial East Berlin. Christian from Tiger Europe joined us for a drink and took us to Sage Club after that, where we made our initial sortie into the Berlin club scene. Though semi-delirious from exhaustion, I sucked it in and had a couple of beers while the dance floor filled up. Nice warm sound and fat beats.

Hook Starr Turns 30!

Koh Samui, 27-30 April

Three nights in the tropical paradise of Koh Samui with Messrs Hook, Peacocke and Kahane - an all-star lineup and a recipe for trouble.

Nothing if not consistent, our portfolio consisted of Singha beers, Thai whiskey buckets, tom yum goong, barbecued prawns and minimal sleep. The 24 Jam scenario started on Friday night with a low-key dinner, Luke lulling us into a false sense of security, before proceeding to drink over a few games of Connect 4 then hit the club.

Brad made friends with the disappearing Rasta crew and I took the only swim all four of us would make at dawn on Saturday. Wandering up and down the main street, sulphur was my overriding sensory memory.

Saturday afternoon saw the 4 of us hang out kampong style and engage in almost proper conversation - luckily beast wars and the prospect of Reno vs a polar bear soon overtook any semblance of sanity.

Sunday I got slower and slower as the water:alcohol ratio in my bloodstream approaced one to three. Luke proved at dinner that we can order with the best of them - ridiculously.

Villa de Cow

Bali, Easter 2007

Travelling with Jamie and Luke on a Thursday evening flight to Bali, we were greeted by Kevin on his 6th beer, and that was how the long weekend progressed. Stayed up chatting the first night, woke early on Friday and Luke went straight for a scotch on the rocks. Chilled in the afternoon (Luke didn't move for 4 hours) and had sundowners at Ku De Ta - beautfiul swim in the sea with Jamie.

Yatin and Craig arrived later that night, and after welcome drinks they headed out to town. I stayed in and greeted them for late night drinks back at the villa. Yatin scored a Korean air hostess thanks to a gracious hand-off by the attached Kevin.

Saturday saw a rude awakening by Craig aka Danja, who was served his just desserts later that night with a gang beating while sleeping. Delicious Soto Ayam was followed by more scotch, swimming and napping, before we dressed up in white pants and Hawaiian shirts for the main event - Neil and Liza's wedding.

Staying still and quiet during the ceremony proved challenging to all of us, but we put on our best behaviour as long as we could. Kevin befriended his own personal midget, Liza's sister's friend blew the boys away, the food and setting were gorgeous and the funk & soul helped us rock the dance floor. Finished up at the villa with more debauchery and a smashed camera.

Sunday was a little ill for all concerned, but still we returned to Ku De Ta where I had a fantastic purging swim in the sea. We feared we became the poseurs we ridiculed and we felt bad. The plane ride back at 10pm was even worse, but getting only three hours sleep at home was the icing on the cake. With lots of injuries but no casualties, we live to party another day.

Goodbye New York

Kept rolling on Sunday with next to no sleep and met Zigman on 79th St on the west side of Central Park. Worked the feeling back into my body with a lovely stroll in the cool spring weather. Paid respects to John Lennon at Strawberry Fields in the customary manner, attempted to enter the Guggenheim but only just managed to stay standing. Instead wandered in the Upper East Side and managed to find a great place for brunch and a Bloody Mary. Said our farewells, packed up at the hotel after my one and only purchase ($8 sunglasses off the street), then checked out and hung out in the hotel lobby till the flight. Final meal and ale at Newark Airport, then fell right asleep before the plane even took off. Straight up and over the north pole, the longest flight in the world worked like a charm. What a city.

Tiger Translate NYC

Saturday - walked to 53rd and 9th for brunch with Reena after a few hours sleep, and checked out her studio pad up the road. Got down to the venue at 3pm and first impressions were a great party was a brewin'...the setup went on as the artists and media engaged in a creative exchange. Met up with the Michaels, Mike and Dale at Cook (?) restaurant a few blocks down in Chelsea, quick bite then off to host my first Tiger party! The crowd, art, beer, venue and vibe all kicked ass and I was really blown away by the world-class and coherent execution. Thank you Electromogatronica! VIP guests included Jared, Zigman, Henry, Kat, the Michaels and Levers, and I connected with a couple of interesting US people in the Translate space.

Post-event we rocked to the Stanton Social in the East Village, another really nice spot (with Jared and his crew, Mogan and his, plus Zigman and his cousin Jen). A few doors were closed after that so we had to bounce around a few times before entering Cielo - thanks to Putri. This place simply blew my mind; the lighting, sound, music and vibe were quite possibly the most yummy dance club experience I've had. Warmed up and into a monster dance set with Mogan and Jared, destroying the dance floor with our Auckland Grammar stylee. They kept trying to put the ugly lights on (though the crowd was pretty premium) but only after three encores did the crowd let the DJ stop. Fantastic end to an amazing week's partying.

Walked back to Jared's flat in the West Village and finished off with a cleansing ale before sunrise. Cabbed down to Battery Park with Mogan and watched the sunrise from the tip of Manhattan. Pure peaceful beautiful bliss. NYPD police drill, bacon eggs and coffee, then an hour of sleep from 9am till 10. 24 Jam.

Friday I'm In Love

Technically, Friday started with the beautiful, quiet dawn outside my window and me wanting to go out and conquer it atop the Empire State Building. Luckily, reality got the better of me and I stole a couple of hours sleep before a meeting with TUSA. Went to the UN and checked out a killer photography exhibit by Phil Borges, then back to MoMA to review the works of Picasso, Mondrian, Monet and friends. Yum. Dinner in Tribeca at Viet Cafe, dessert around the corner at Mai House, then I took a dozen guests (artists and journos) over to the East Village to Orchid Lounge and China 1 - Tiger rocks. As the hardcore crew dwindled, two triple pees stood up and we rocked back to the Meatpacking District, got a tip from a homeless dude, and found ourselves getting jiggy with it in a hot NYC club. Mental note: if you put your drink down, someone will take it away. Somehow, walking along the cold streets with eyes bright in the early morning, I felt that my heart was beating in rhythm with the city's pulse. My energy wasn't coming from sleep, it was coming from the city itself.

Yes!

After a relatively decent sleep, Thursday was more human and after a productive morning meeting I went to Bloomingdales around noon and scored a couple of neat pieces for the butchers'. A fortuitous meeting with Mike Lever led to a gorgeous lunch across the road where Susan, Mike, his designer Bree and I caught up over enormous salads and a beer. Met Mogan and walked through central park like a couple, very pleasant in the spring sunshine. Met Henry and had chicken noodle soup at the Brooklyn Diner, hearing about his doctorate, teaching career, ex-boyfriend with HIV, and how he first heard the word "condom" from me when we were nine. Walking back to Chambers I realised how this city makes me feel; 100% myself. Watched some comedy after that with Mogan in the room, then met up with all the media and artists and took them out to Town, Gin Lane (saw an arrest), 5 9th and Brass Monkey. The music in 5 9th was sweet electro and I want to hear more. Slept at 7.30 am, 24 Jam.

Sensory Overload

After forcing myself to go to sleep at 6am on Tuesday night, I slept for five hours then had a lunch meeting with Lizzy and Mogan. Body feeling pretty weird, we took a couple of cases of Tiger down to the artists' studio on White & Broadway, then wandered a little in the area. Picked up a nice treat for Jamie from Petal Pizzazz, then rocked up to meet Susan. Grabbed a quick bite, a shot of whiskey and a beer in Times Square then caught Talk Radio with Liev Schreiber at the Long Acre - fantastic! Met up with Mogan after the show, checked out Double Happiness in Soho, walked through Chelsea and had a slice of heavenly pepperoni pizza, then finished up back in the same bar in Times Square. Sensory Overload. Got a decent sleep in preparation for the rest of the week.

Darryl Mac!

Woke up at 9 and worked awhile, but the highlight here today was sitting on the sofa in the lobby of the Chambers Hotel and having a lovely wee chat with D from RUN DMC! Solid.

Long lunch at Rue 57 then over to Lexington to see Susan at Bloomingdales - mmm...authentic wife beaters...next time.

Met up with Jared, Kat and Roxanne for dinner at Fig & Olive in the Meatpacking District, then Henry Wong Doe at Spice Market - over to Soho and then back for the real deal cocktails at Employees Only in the West Village. NOICE!

Lower East Side

Manhattan

Shifting from Jersey to the city, met Mogan and Lizzy for lunch at Balthazar in Soho and wandered a little. Visited the Xchange with Khairi and Putri before a delicious duck confit at Casimir in Alphabet City. Mogan and I started our research and hit an array of joints in the East Village: Bao 111, The Sunburnt Cow, Orchid Lounge, Horus Cafe and China 1. The owner there helped us get into Le Souk, one of the hottest clubs in town. Industry night baby.

http://www.odinnewyork.com
http://www.china1nyc.com

New York's Fine

Greeted by a bright sun at noon on Sunday, upped and out of bed to big phat panckaes at Lily's diner, with Betty Boop in on the action.

Blown away at the Museum of Modern Art (floors five, four and three), strolled down 5th Avenue around 6pm, stopped for a drink at the Rennaissance bar before heading downtown to Rosa Mexicana for dinner. Outstanding!

http://www.moma.org

Paul Revere's Ride

Andre Hill, New Jersey

Eighteen and a half hours, the world's longest non-stop flight, an Alaskan sunrise and a dinner in Nyack, NJ. Next thing you know I'm having a puff and a scotch, a serious sleep and it's eggs over easy in the Michaels' kitchen. Saturday afternoon we took Bailey and Robbie for a work at Piermont and took it easy, before burgers and Bass ale for dinner.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Major_John_Andre/

Tactical Insertion

Saigon, 12 February 2007

Greeted by overweight choppers long out of commission, 24 hours in the Vietnamese capital left me impressed by the hordes of motorcyclists that operate without ever looking sideways or backwards, only ahead. The Majestic and Q Bar made great pit stops, while the Museum of Fine Art showcased the aweseome sacrifice made by the country's sisters and mothers back in the 70s.

http://www.majesticsaigon.com.vn/
http://www.qbarsaigon.com/
http://www.galeriequynh.com/

Near Miss

Bangkok, 1 January 2007

A smashing start to the new year with a bottle of scotch and a DVD, we locked ourselves in a hotel room and kept our phones switched off. Earlier that evening on Silom Soi 38 we narrowly missed being blown up by some unpatriotic bastards.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/6221177.stm