Get Duffed!

Let's get this started with some Duff beer on a Sunday night. Getting up to speed with a new Sony Ericsson that is now my handphone, walkman, camera and mobile blogging machine!

Like a Punch in the Guts

Sunday 30 March

Dozing till close to noon, I drank water, got up to pee, snoozed again, before deciding to remove myself from the comfortable womb of this western hotel and wander down the street to one of Yangon's most famous markets. I'll admit I was hungover as I flopped down the street, absorbing whatever I came across but not really able to process it.

Turning left at an intersection I was overcome with a beautiful sensation as sweet fragrances unlike anything I had ever experienced filled the air. The light jingle of clear bells accompanied the heavenly scent, borne from the gears of the old machines that ground sugar cane still in 2008.

Over a railway bridge and past a poor deformed beggar child, I wandered into the market proper, drifting this way and that among the cobbled streets and past all sorts of colours, goods, people and sounds. People wanted to sell me this, offer that, but I floated through it all with a smile and an expression of wonder.

Deciding that some food would be a good idea, I settled on the only cafe I had seen, just near the foot bridge, and ordered some fried rice and a coke from a young kid with the best smile ever. From ear to ear he grinned at me and took my order in English, then dashed inside to transmit it and over again to pick up something else.

Wandering back over the bridge afterwards, to check out of the hotel and head to the airport, I saw the beggar child once again and felt so sorry for him it was an automatic response to give him 200 kyats, or twenty cents. When he looked up at me, through one eye, this pitiful boy showed his beautiful, grateful soul and I saw a pure smile of thanks for this tiny gesture. I couldn't take it then, and fell apart on the bridge before I moved to the side of the tracks and wept for this boy. The horror of so many people undergoing such suffering overcame me, and the rest of the trip was spent in numb recognition of the gross inequity in the world today.

A True Gentleman's Game

Saturday 29 March

Hitting breakfast at 5.30, leaving the hotel by 6, and getting ready to tee off at 6.30 am before the real heat kicked in, I felt like I was finally giving in to a sort of gentleman's code that I had ignored for so long. Having not played golf since the 90s, I had no idea how I was going to fare, but I had the right shirt, acceptable shoes and a positive attitude!

Turned out that I can still hit a ball straight and even get a respectable distance on some shots, so I had a very enjoyable game along with James, the GM Peter, two local sales managers and a few key customers. In the early morning shade under temples nestled in majestic hills, the peace and beauty of the place was highlighted by some young novice monks who smiled and gave me the 'OK' hand-sign on the second hole. I wasn't keeping score but feeling the flow, especially with intermittent stops involving cold beer, our first at 8.15am!

In all we were on the course for 6 hours, and by the end it was as hot as a sauna and I was sporting a light bronze glow. We gorged on lunch and cruised back to the hotel where I plunged into the pool and indulged in a fantastic foot massage - sorry, am I feeling guilty yet? No. Packed my bag with not a second to lose and headed to the airport for another shuttle jet back to Yangon.

Intending to catch some Zs on the flight but in fact only having a short power nap and the rest of the time in animated discussion, I must have been sucking energy from all the golden pagodas over which we were flying! Was picked up by Win Zar at the airport and again I dropped my bag and headed straight to dinner, a delicious and healthy meal at a Yunnan BBQ restaurant - fish, chicken, veges and dofu! Headed to Power Light, a large outlet where the entertainment was an array of singers and models who paraded around unsmilingly and received garlands from the crowd, followed by Country House, an ABC lead outlet where I had my first ever ABC draught followed by the much lighter Myanmar beer. Finished off the night at a place called Music Club, one of the country's only discos in the basement of the Park Royal Hotel. Crashed finally and got my first decent sleep since Monday.

Tiger Translate Mandalay Jam!

Friday 28 March

After a few hours sleep at the airport hotel in Bangkok, I hopped on an early, short flight to Yangon filled with anticipation about throwing a beer party in a country with one of the worst human rights records in the world. At the same time I was supremely excited about discovering an enormous, beautiful, Buddhist country that seemed to live in an isolated time warp.

Landing in Yangon and driving down the tree-lined streets, my first impression was of the abundance of mid-80s Toyota Corollas and people walking down the streets, not a few of which were barefoot monks. Our office was set up a driveway and in a two-storey colonial building, as if it could have been a guest house prior to becoming the headquarters of the nation's biggest brewer.

After an excellent briefing about the market, the ethnic groups, the border influences and the infamous Golden Triangle (a veritable country in itself, run by drug lords at the intersection of Laos, Thailand and Myanmar), James took me to lunch on some fantastic noodles in a garden that could have been set in the Far North of NZ at the height of summer. We checked out a modern supermarket then headed for the domestic airport, where an Air Bagan shuttle jet took us via Heho to Mandalay.

Hot hot hot! 38 degrees but dry, the 40 minute drive from the airport took us down dusty, bumpy rural roads and into the more built-up but no less dusty or bumpy city. Our hotel was across the road from an enormous, sprawling palace with its own golf course inside and fully surrounded by a moat, but unfortunately time didn't permit us to appreciate its splendour. We met the hotel manager, dropped our bags and proceeded to the event venue, a large open-air restaurant called Mya Nandar set right on the bank of the Ayeyarwady River. The crowd flowed in early and set the organisers' minds at ease - they had taken a risk by throwing the first ever event of this nature in Mandalay!

We got some food in us and proceeded to rock the party which needed little encouragement - the Thai DJs got the crowd going easily and before the night was over we'd sold out of beer and got almost 600 people into a happy sweaty state of joy! Met a handful of kids from the US who were teaching English, plus one or two rich men's sons, before bouncing down a dark bumpy road to a karaoke joint that seemed like a potential horror movie set. It was a two-storey shack with a tiny TV and not much fun, but I enjoyed the cold beer and fruit there before heading for a super painful 2 hour massage with our general manager! This guy knows how to jam, and at 2am we hit the hay, agreeing to meet for breakfast only 3 hours later.