Tiger Translate London

Saturday 20 September

I was kind to myself and everyone today, so there were no official duties until 3pm. I slept till around twelve, then headed out to get some lunch at a local pub with Max. Again, I was amazed by London's approach - the first pub had no cook on duty, the second one had no electricity, the third one had beer but no food. Pretty fed up by then I said to Max, "F*ck it, let's get a pint" and proceeded to do so and order a bloody Domino's pizza into the pub. The developing world seems more civilised in comparison.

Spent the afternoon getting ready at the event venue with all the artists, managed to grab a decent diner meal (cheeseburger, fries and coke) with Max, Mee Wong and Badral Bold which was a sweet little respite (though as Max said, in this environment where trashiness would be appropriate, the joint's design was a little too English, subtle and tasteful to classify as a real American diner).

At 8pm the doors opened and the show peaked around 11pm with the live art battle, though the UK beatboxer and The Nextmen were my highlights - the latter played everything including the kitchen sink, and by 1am when Tommy Gerard rocked up, he was introducing me to the true meaning of dubstep. Had a good yum seng with Max and his mate from Otago, drank a few quality beverages, boogied, socialised and generally had a good time.

After the venue was cleared out at 2am, I gathered the final party crew and took the van to Dalston Jazz Club, a tiny little place that was packed liked sardines but still functioning. Again I failed to see the civilisation in this setup and so ordered a round of Beerlao, before popping onto the street for some fresh air with Tommy. When the time came to go back in and get Max, the bouncer enforced the by-now-infurating licensing laws, so I took Tommy's advice and had to use Jedi mind power to entice Max out of the bar. We tried one more bar up the road and suffered the same old gag, after which I had seriously had enough and we made a beeline back to the hotel to drink some single malt.

As Mr Hook said recently, the US and Europe may have only recently been considered the first world, but Asia is rapidly knocking them off their pedestal and it's very interesting to experience the difference first-hand. Back in the comfort of our room, we listened to iTunes, sipped on Macallan and ice and shot the shit till dawn. Primo.